Forty-One Years

    Allen walked into the coffee shop. His face bore a bit of surprise. He came in an hour later than usual. He expected more customers. He tossed a newspaper on his favorite table. That was his usual. It was a way of marking his territory. 

Three women stood ahead of him in the line at the counter. That was not particularly unusual. 

Megan, the tattooed purple-haired barista, winked and nodded. And Allen returned the wink and nod, confirming his usual order. 

He paid the cashier and moved to the spot to pick up his Americano with a triple shot. 

“Running late?” Megan asked with a smile.

“Taking a day off,” Allen said.

“From what?” Megan joked.

“Come on, Megan,” Allen said, “I have a job.”

“That’s not a job,” Megan smiled, sliding his cup of coffee across the counter. “You go in at eight and stay until noon. That’s long enough to make everybody nervous and remind them you are the guy who signs their checks, and you leave and play golf.”

“That’s not true,” Allen said. “I don’t play golf.”

Allen grabbed his coffee. “See ya tomorrow.” 

“Try to be on time,” Megan said.

Allen walked to his table and nearly came to a stop. One of the women who was in front of him in the line sat at his table. He shrugged and picked up his paper, and scanned the room for another table.

“Oh, I’m sorry,” the woman said. “I didn’t know that was your paper.”

“No need to apologize,” Allen said. “I walk in here thinking I own the place. It does me good to be humbled.”

“I’m sorry if it came off that way. It wasn’t my intention,” Megan said. 

“The best lessons are the ones that are unintentional,” Allen said. “But that was just my lame attempt at humor.”

She smiled. It was a familiar smile—a smile from a long forgotten memory—a good memory.

“You look familiar,” Allen said. 

“Are you Allen Walker?”

“And you are Ellie, Ellie Harden.”

“It’s Ellie Cameron, now.”

“That’s right, I heard you married Sam Cameron.”

“And what about you?” Ellie said. “Please sit.”

“Sure,” Allen said and sat across from Ellie. “I really can’t believe this is you.”

Ellie smiled, looked around, and smiled. “Do you want me to get somebody else to sit in for me?”

“I don’t think either one of us has lost our sense of humor,” Allen said. “And how long has it been?”

“Forty-one years,” Ellie said. “And… what about you?”

“You mean marriage?” Allen said.

“I married a girl from New York,” Allen said. “She was the sister of a friend.”

They began sipping their coffees.

“How many children?” Ellie said.

“Two,” Allen said. “And three grandchildren.”

“Well, good for you.”

“What about you?”

“A son and that’s it.”

“Grandchildren?” Allen asked.

“I don’t think he’ll ever get married,” Ellie said.

“He may surprise you someday.”

“So, what do you do?” Ellie asked.

“Wholesale automotive parts,” Allen said. “The Allen Company.” 

“I’ve heard of you,” Ellie said.

“Clever name, aye?” Allen said. 

“I never connected the two,” Ellie said. “That’s not to say I didn’t remember you.”

“And what do you do?”

“I became a teacher. I retired and work as a social worker now.”

“I remember you were always very kind and patient. Good traits for both careers.”

Allen sipped his coffee. A pleasant memory passed through his mind. He glanced up at Ellie. He wondered if he should say what he was thinking.

“Remember the Freshman dance?” Allen said.

“Yes,” she smiled.

“It was my first time I ever danced with a girl,” Allen said. “You weren’t the first girl I danced with, but you were the girl I danced with the most.”

“You were the only boy who danced with me that night. I remember standing in a group with my girlfriends. A slow song just started to play. You walked toward us. Everybody wondered who you were going to ask.” Her face opened into a smile. “It was me.”

“Can’t tell you how nervous I was. No confidence,” Allen said.

“I look back at some old pictures and we were all so awkward looking,” Ellie said.

“Don’t show me those pictures,” Allen chuckled. “I prefer to remember it the way I hope I looked.”

“Are you still married?” Ellie asked.

“No,” Allen forced a smile. “My wife died two years ago.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Thank you.”

“I can tell it is still fresh,” Ellie said.

“At times, as if yesterday.”

They sipped, and it became quiet between them. Only the sounds of coffee shop chatter and the shush from the coffee maker. They smiled at each other.

“Are you thinking what I’m thinking?” Ellie asked.

“Probably,” Allen grinned.

“I broke your heart, didn’t I?”

“I’d be lying if I said you didn’t.”

Allen looked around the coffee shop. He felt as if this was all a scene from a play and everybody was watching. However, everyone was playing their own scenes.

“It was right after graduation,” Allen said. “We turned in our gowns, and I saw you standing in the hallway. I took a deep breath and rehearsed every word as I walked toward you. You looked up and smiled. I said to myself, ‘This is going to be easy.’ I said, “Hey, Ellie, are you seeing anyone or are you engaged or something?’”

“Those are the exact words I remember,” Ellie said. “And I said, ‘I just got engaged and he just walked behind you.’ And you never bothered to turn around. You put all you had into a congratulations, but it didn’t cover the way you felt.”

Allen smiled and patted Ellie’s hand. “I recovered.”

“So did I,” Ellie said. 

“I know what we’re thinking,” Allen said. “After a lifetime, finally returning to a first love, as if it was all meant to be. But the truth is they seldom are.”

“For us, forty-one years of sweet memories and perhaps, unrealized dreams and fantasies—shattered by reality,” Ellie turned her head aside for a moment. She did not want to see Allen’s expression. 

There was some small talk. And they finished their coffee at the same time.

“I have to go now,” she said. 

“Let me take your cup,” Allen said.

“Thank you.”

They stood.

Ellie smiled. “Perhaps we’ll meet again and share another coffee.”

“Perhaps not,” Allen said. “I’m not saying that to be unkind or rude. It’s petty, but forty-one years ago, it took me a couple of years to shake it off.”

“You’re right,” Ellie said. “That day, I wished I’d never met you or my fiancé. It was the worst day of my life. And one more thing, I would have broken your heart later.”

“Goodbye, Ellie.”

“Goodbye, Allen.”